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THE STRING BEAN STRANGER



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THE STRING BEAN STRANGER

I came to life with goofy looks That just my mom could love; With mismatched parts that didn't fit I seemed consisted of Dumbo's ears and Jumbo's nose, A dandelion's hair; Washboard ribs and broomstick legs, That ended with a pair Of kangaroo feet that couldn't skip To save my scrawny hide; 'Wore cowboy boots to give me calves And long-sleeve shirts to hide String-like arms that dangled long And shoulders like a hanger; And when I looked at normal boys, I had to fight the anger Of wishing for a little meat To hang upon my bones; 'Cause muscled boys attracted girls To swoon around their thrones. And so it went throughout my youth The handsome weren't in danger Of losing Suzie to the one They called the ""Stringbean Stranger"". A couple decades come and gone Since beauty took its share, And now it's fun to look around And see how we compare. We've gained our weight and, holy cow! The football stars are porky; With hair all combed to hide the dome The Prom King's looking dorky! And me? My shirts are filling out 'Til any day I'll be Nearly normal in my weight For someone tall as me. Others greet each crease of age With anguish and alarm; But ""character lines"" on my plain face Sure can't do me harm. And so the gorgeous all decline, And think the clock's a curse; But age can help us fellahs who Could not have gotten worse!
Wes Stephenson

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